Me - as a cartoon character

The front door has become my enemy. There is an inside door and and outside glass door. Then there is a small step down. Right now there is a large trash can sitting near it to avoid it blowing over in the wind we've been having. It impedes opening the outside door all the way. I'll move that in the morning.

Today as I was leaving for work I caught the small loop on my sling pack (bag that sits over one shoulder)on the outside door handle. The inside door was a little open and I couldn't reach it to close it. I was holding coffee which I couldn't sit down - unable to bend because I was tethered to the door. I debated throwing it into the yard - not precious coffee! The cats - oh the risk. Margeaux or Vegas may run out and Stumpy might run IN. I knew I had to close the access. I strained and got a finger on the inside door and got it at least mostly closed and I then began the struggle to free myself. I'm lucky I didn't have to wait for a passer by to free me. I felt like the "retard" in the movie Drop Dead Gorgeous when he gets his bib overalls stuck on a parking meter. Writhing around trying to contort out of the situation - looking like some type of comedy act.

This evening I went out to see if I left my ever-shrinking cell phone in my car. Remember the days when talking in a cell phone was like talking in your shoe? I am wistful. My car is currently parked out front while we await a replacement garage door. On my way back in, conscious Stumpy was advancing on my rear and Margeaux was approaching from the front, I started in the front door and stumbled in. I fell and my foot was caught in the outside door. It was a slow fall and I wasn't really hurt as much as I touched my wounded knee which is excruciating. I'm mad at that door. It better stop it's shenanigans or it's getting replaced with a CURTAIN!